“Turn up. Ask them real questions. Look them in the eye. And care about what they’ve got to say.”
This week we’re continuing the slow relationship theme, looking at existing friendships: not only how to maintain them, but how to deepen them.
There’s no question that as time goes on and big life milestones pass, friendships change and some fade. But one of the biggest things we stand to lose by living a busy, un-intentional life is the relationships that have the potential to be deep and life-long. How do we make sure we give these friendships our time and attention? And how do we talk about slow living with our pals?
Like any relationship, friendships are built on trust and time. So how can we ensure we commit to our people, even if we’re operating in different spheres, or don’t necessarily share the same values?
As well as diving deep in to those questions, we discuss different ways to talk to our friends about slow living, including how to explain any impacts the changes you’re making might have on them, and the importance of showing that you’re still there for them. If you value someone, bring them into what you’re doing without being forceful – invite them to where you are, and reciprocate the love and acceptance.
When it comes to those deep, true friendships, so many of us ask ourselves how we can take them to the next level, and have the deeper conversations beyond the everyday and superficial. I have some practical tips for you, while Ben shares his experience with creating space for meaningful conversations, as a man (where stereotypically, there is less inclination to go deep).
We finish the episode by sharing some different ways you can spend time and build bonds with your buds, highlighting that it doesn’t have to be all deep & meaningful, teary conversations. Joy, creativity, play and shared projects all play a role in strengthening friendships.
As does telling your friends that you love them, and that you’re thinking of them. Which is this week’s action – reach out to a friend and tell them you appreciate them, and that they sprung to mind after listening to this episode. Then reach out to us: we’d love to hear your thoughts about this episode.
How are you trying to bring more slow, depth and intention to your friendships? Comment on Facebook or Instagram and share the love.
Or you can listen to the show directly, simply by hitting the Play button above. Enjoy!
Things to Check Out After Today’s Episode:
- The Making of Men with Dr Arne Rubenstein – Episode 91
- Presence Over Presents – Episode 214
- On Boundaries, Compromise and Communication – Episode 183
- We Go Deep – Episode 60
- All the Slow Book Tour events
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