Over the past couple of weeks, I stepped back from the online world. I went 10 days without checking emails and over two weeks without posting to the blog or social media.
And, somewhat surprisingly, the world didn’t stop spinning.
The world didn’t stop spinning, but my head certainly did.
And do you know what I realised? I’ve shifted so far away from my personal philosophies that I hardly recognise myself.
Back in the day, before my breakdown, before I closed my business, before I discovered the delight of living a simpler, slower life, I used to rush everywhere.
Everything was hurried and harried. I was never off. I was never at peace. I could never sit and watch a movie without checking my email. I couldn’t enjoy playing with my daughter without feeling like there was something more important to do.
While I was offline these past two weeks I realised I had become that hurried, harried, disengaged person again.
Ironically, writing, blogging, podcasting, teaching, tweeting and Facebooking about slow and simple living has made my life fast-paced, hectic and far too complicated.
Previous to this offline break, I can’t remember the last time I was able to fully disconnect from work and be present in my day to day life. What’s more, it happened so gradually that I wasn’t even aware of it until now.
So I’ve come to a difficult, but ultimately positive decision: I’m stepping back and making some big changes.
That means I’ll be closing The Bloom at the end of August (members, all details are in the email I sent on Friday) and aside from show notes for the podcast, I won’t be posting here regularly.
Instead, I’m going to spend the rest of 2015 focusing on the podcast and our in-person Slow Living events, while reclaiming the slower, simpler life we’ve worked so hard for. (I’ll also be sending an exclusive article to newsletter subscribers once a month.)
I need to re-engage with my priorities. I need to let my ego go. I need to stop thinking that success and importance come from busyness. I need to simplify.
I can’t, in good conscience, talk about the benefits of living a slow, intentional life if behind the scenes I’m living in a way that is anything but. That’s hypocritical and it’s doing everyone a disservice.
The truth is, living a slower, more intentional life means making hard choices and tough decisions. It means saying no to things I want to do now in order to say yes to things I really want in the future.
This has not been an easy decision, which is why I can tell you it’s the right one.
I also want to tell you how much your support, kind words, emails, messages, comments and encouragement has meant to me over the past 4+ years. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for being part of this community and thank you for your support and your understanding.
Here’s to walking the slow walk.